my incredible fallenness

dear friends,

i have been reminded tonight of my incredible fallenness.

and in being reminded, i have been tempted to discredit this book and my worth as an author and as a person, because i have unintentionally failed a family which i interviewed in the book by not protecting their names.

two years ago i interviewed the chalmers family, whose daughter, emma, has an incredible, Christ-centered story of healing from anorexia and i’ve included it in Chasing Silhouettes, near the back, along with the story of her parents. i forgot to change emma’s name, like she had asked, as well as the name of her parents, and i am so sorry.

also, please note that while emma was accepted into mercy ministries canada, as the book states, she did not end up attending. rather, in her own words:

“I actually ended up finding healing through a broken pastor who betrayed my trust, my church and left her husband without warning.

“I attended a secular program with several mentally damaged women, but we found strength in each other and laughed at the government written program and its uselessness. The positivity of our alikeness helped me feel happier and want to live.

“Finally I learned to love my body from the instruction of a yoga mentor, who suggested I recited mantra each night, thanking The Lord for each piece of my being.”

emma is an inspiration to me. she creates beautiful artwork. her sister and her mother sewed a gorgeous quilt for my mother in law when she was sick with cancer.

it hurts me, to have hurt her. to have hurt them. please accept my apology, and know that i wrote this book with one goal in mind: not that i might be made greater, but that he might. our Lord and Savior, to whom we owe everything.

tonight has reminded me of this. of my fallenness, of his greatness. and of my continued need for healing.

in grace, e.

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10 thoughts on “my incredible fallenness

  1. Oh, friend. I know that forgiveness isn’t mine to give in this instance – and that’s fine – but I can still give you a reminder: we’ve *all* fallen short of the glory of God. All. And there is no shortcoming that merits self-harm, Emily. After writing a whole book about recovering from a condition based on self-harm, please don’t return to it in another form. You are loved and worth loving. Praying for you and Emma now…that God would give you both what you need and settle your hearts.

  2. Emily, my heart goes out to you. That broken ache that comes from unintentionally hurting someone is awful. It will ease over time.
    I pray that you are able to deeply believe in grace today.

  3. ((hugs)) and grace to you…it takes such courage for one to put their self out there…there is a high risk…a vulnerability that can cut someone deep….may love and grace heal over the wounds done with out malice…and may you not be wounded by this misstep…may mercy and grace abound for all…xoxoxo

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